February 2, 2006
I’m at the toy store. I am standing at the cash register and holding a couple of items. I place said items on the counter and start fishing through my purse and get out my CASH. Now, if you have half a fucking brain, you’re gonna guess that I’m wanting to purchase those items. Right? Right.
Cashier: Hi. You want to buy those?
Me: No. Actually I want you to take them ever so gently and shove them up your ass.
Cashier: Will that be cash or charge?
Flash back a few days ago. I’m once again standing in line at the grocery store. I didn’t, however, get Betty. She’s a hoot. A retarded hoot, but fun nonetheless.
Anyway, I get Ginny. What a prize she was. I’m guessing she is about 24. So, she perhaps graduated from high school about 6 or 7 years ago. I’m hoping that before they handed Ginny her diploma, that she was able to do basic math. Weeeeeeell, that is clearly not the case.
My purchase came to $37.42. I had two twenty dollar bills. Hmmmm. That is $40 dollars. With me so far? Good. I took a moment to see if I had the .42 cents to go with those 2 twenties to make Ginny’s life easier in that moment. Low and behold, I had exactly .42 cents. I hand Ginny $40.42. She rings in……ready? Hold on. She rings in that I gave her $940.42.
Well you might as well have told her that there was a bomb next to her and it was gonna blow. She panics. I see her starting to sweat. Good Lord, it’s not fucking rocket science. I’m standing there, waiting for her to give me THREE FUCKING DOLLARS.
Come on Ginny, you can do it. You’re in your 2o’s for shitsake, you can figure this out. Please tell me you can figure this out. My 5 year old can figure it out. A drooling, masturbating monkey can figure this out. I’m rootin’ for ya Ginny.
I give her a moment to get it together. I’ve now crossed my fingers that she’s either going to figure out that she owes me three bucks or maybe that she’s going to give me back $903 dollars. Either way, shit or get off the pot and let me get out of here. She finally looks at me and leans over and says, “I’m not sure how much change to give you back”. Ginny, Ginny, Ginny. I’m thinking that working as a cashier, having to deal with money and perhaps having to do math in your head on occasion is not the career path you should be taking. Hmmmm, you’re not pretty enough to be a model of any kind. Shit. You’re screwed hun. You’re stupid and ugly. May the force be with you.
Posted by Sassy @ 9:55 pm • Uncategorized •
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February 3rd, 2006 at 6:01 am, ozymandiaz Says:
A World of Fools
‘Tis a world of fools I see
Collected broken symmetry
Displays itself so openly
Oblivious enough to be
Living ever so happily
‘Tis a world of fools I see
The effects of which are dastardly
Surviving somehow inexorably
And thriving inconceivably
Regardless of what future will be
‘Tis a world of fools I see
Buffoons with no decency
Parading ignorance obviously
But the thing I find most scary
Is there are non more foolish than me
February 3rd, 2006 at 6:43 am, Pusher Robot Says:
VERY VERY FUNNY !!!!!!
and inspiring…reminded me of an experience i had which when i get a second i think i will write about very very soon!
Thank you for the laugh this morning!
February 3rd, 2006 at 1:07 pm, miss_lissa Says:
omg Babe…
kinda reminds me of when I was working at the clothing store.
The stupid stupid vain women I would have to wait on & work with.
LOL
Now I know what to blog about today!!
So come read me in a bit.
~Muahh! Mellie
February 3rd, 2006 at 1:25 pm, Webmiztris Says:
lol - younger people can’t subtract 2 from 2 anymore…everyone is so dependent on a computer to do everything for them! I’m not a math whiz by any means, but at least I can still do simple subtraction…
February 3rd, 2006 at 2:05 pm, mzthang Says:
lol girl! You had me rolling today