February 10, 2006
It’s 11:53 pm and that means it’s almost Friday. By the time I post this, it could be after 12, so yay.
Let’s see, how did my day go? Well, okay I guess, kinda boring but really, how exciting can housework be? Oh wait now, I did also bathe. That was mildly exciting.
Oh I forgot. I got a phone call today from Marnie. Marnie sells lawn care products. That’s really great Marnie, but it’s February. In Calgary. Albeit, we have no snow sweetie, but it’s still February. Lawn care is the farthest thing from my mind (Like it’s ever really on my mind).
She continues on despite my protest that I’m really not interested in lawn care. We have a lawn, we mow it in late spring and all through the summer and into the fall. I sometimes plant some flowers. But beyond that, lawn care bores me. So move on Marnie. I’m not falling for your gimmicks.
But Marnie is persistant, like blow flies on a pile of shit (she’s the shit, not me mmmkay?) and she keeps rambling on and on. My lawn will thank me she says! Thank me? My lawn is going to thank me? Really? Like how? Take me to dinner? Buy me those funky high heels I want from the mall? Give me an orgasm? ‘Cause I’m tellin’ ya Marnie, unless my lawn is going to really thank me, shut your freakin’ cake hole about the ‘products’ that will change my life. Sure. The only thing I’m interesting in “tending to” is my own personal lawn (wink wink) if you get my drift.
You need to hang it up Marnie. Like now.
Happy Friday everyone. The weekend is here.