Oh My Gawd Sodagirl!
Random Crap.  Could Be Boring.  Be Forewarned.

February 26, 2006

It’s Sunday morning and it’s pretty quiet here so far. My 2 youngest are playing Nintendo in another room, my husband is sleeping, and all 3 teenagers are fast asleep too (well it’s only 11am, Lord knows they wouldn’t be up yet).


I’m bored. I’m listening to music, Theory of a Deadman…love their latest album. I could have seen them in concert on Friday night but noone told me they were in town until yesterday. Gee, thanks. Holy, I’m gonna put myself to sleep with this banter. B-o-r-r-r-r-r-ing.


Hey, did you know a guy meowed at me? I know, I was like, ‘what the fuck?’, too. This happened last summer. I was walking to the grocery store and this guy was sitting out in his backyard. I walked past him and he literally meowed at me. He sounded like a real cat. Now, yes, in my lifetime, I’ve been whistled at, whooped at, hollered at ‘damn, you wanna come over here little lady?’, you know, the usual bullshit guys sometimes do. Anyway, I can safely say, that was the very first time I had ever been meowed at. Loser.


Some dude came to our door yesterday and asked what our phone number is and also wanted to know the brand of vacuum cleaner I used. I kicked him in the balls. I don’t normally kick guys in the ball sac like ever, but hey that’s personal info buddy, get lost, take the hint and go pound sand. I told him I just knew he was a spy. He told me to have a nice day.


I didn’t really kick nosey parker in the balls. Just FYI. But I wanted to.


I really hate showoffs, don’t you? Fuck they’re annoying.


Hey, if you’re still with me, I warned you upfront, that this was random crap and I in no way promised it would be interesting. So get over it.


I saw my old bag neighbor yesterday, giving me the evil eye. If she keeps that shit up, I’m totally gonna steal her fucking knome/troll/monster thing from her little cemetary garden thing she’s got going. Keep it up granny and you’ll never see that ceramic motherfucker again. Oh and her fat, dumb, stoned daughter is pregnant. Terrific.


I watched 2 movies this weekend. How exciting is that? It’s not. It really isn’t. The movies weren’t bad though. Oh BTW, don’t ever rent a movie called ‘The Cave’. It should have been called, ‘What This Shit?’.


My 9 year old thinks God is the weatherman. I guess he’s kinda right. He also told his sister to get over herself.


My teenage boys whip each other with rolled up dishtowels and fight like 2 little girls. It’s quite funny to watch.


Some old guy came to my door last week, peddling his photography, wanting to know if I wanted a family portrait done. He came to my house about 6 months ago and obviously didn’t remember that I told him then, that I do my own photography. He wanted to come in and see my ‘studio’. My ‘studio’ is wherever I make it. And like I’m going to let a stranger come in and walk around my house. As if. He showed me a picture of a retarded looking family (they looked like apes really.) and I said, well that’s nice but I am not paying you or anyone else to do my pics when I can do my own and have been since ’97. He snorted and said, “I bet I’ve never heard of you”. I told him, that, I bet he’s never heard of me either but that I’m way younger than he is, way better looking, have more talent and probably get laid waaaaaaaaaaay more, so sucks to be you buddy. Good luck with your photography. Now scram. Sheesh, some people.


Okay, listen, I’ve got some things to do, like pluck my eyebrows, paint my toenails, have a nap and play online poker. Not in that particular order but you get the idea. I hope you’re all having a much more exciting Sunday than I am and if any solicitors come sniffing around, send them to me.









Posted by Sassy @ 12:53 pmUncategorized12 comments  

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12 Responses to “Random Crap. Could Be Boring. Be Forewarned.”

  1. I love you. You never call me anymore though. What’s with that? Did you get a new best friend? Did you go back to you old one. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha………..yeah right. Like you need her stupid immature shit, when you can have mine. Call me. I miss your voice. It’s not been 24 hours yet but I’m ready to explode if I don’t hear your voice soon. :o )

  2. congratulation, your blog is so beautiful

  3. Yes Sassy, congratulation. FO shizzle.

  4. lol @ the dude mewling at ya like a kitten….and who peddles photography door to door?

    That’s the dude that needed a kick….

  5. I meow at my wife all the time, but then again she makes me purr. Hey, after you poke the old bag in her eye send the troll thingy down here, I’ll give you the address if you want, and I’ll give it ti the neighbor kids…they can destroy anything.

  6. my boyfriend makes cat noises but only to me…i hope..

    you have teenagers? honestly, and i am not saying this to get on your good side, you don’t look old enough.

  7. Girl I want to come and live near you because you seem to have the most interesting neighbors and stors. roflmao!!

  8. OMGZ!!111 I’ll bet that fo-tog-rape-er is sooo much more popular than you. What a fucking dipshit. You should have really kicked him in the balls. :P

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