April 30, 2006
………I’m not married to an idiotic, redneck, dirtbag hillbilly who doesn’t bathe. I’m sure that’s what you’re all thinking. It’s probably being spread around the internet as I’m typing this. **Insert sarcasm here**. Lemme explain.
A couple of days ago, my husband was reading through my archives. I was curious as to why and he explained:
Me: Why are you looking through my blog? You’ve seen it all before.
Him: I’m not happy.
Me: Not happy about what?
Him: About how you’re portraying me.
Me: Huh?
Him: Well you have all these nice pictures of yourself on here.
Me: Ah ya, well, it is my blog.
Him: Well you only have 2 pictures of me and both of them make me look like some kind of stupid redneck who doesn’t bathe.
Me: Huh?
Him: It’s true. The last pic you posted of me, I’m standing beside the bear and I’m wearing work clothes.
Me: Yes. It’s a cool pic and I’m sure anyone with half a brain realizes that you are wearing work clothes and are not assuming you’re a dirty pig.
Him: Well I want people to know that I’m not a dirty pig. (He’s not a dirty pig). And the other pic of me on your blog is the one where I have the stupid ‘billybob’ teeth in.
Me: Yes honey, it was a joke. Our whole family has ‘billybob’ teeth in. I’m sure they realize it’s a joke and that we, and you’re included in this sweetie, don’t really have hillbilly teeth and we’re not retarded. Nor dirty. Nor pigs. Nor rednecks.
Him: Ya well I want people to know I’m not a redneck with no brains. (He’s not a redneck with no brains and he has all of his teeth).
Soooooooooo, yesterday we went to the Drumheller Badlands and had a little rock climbing adventure and I took over 140 pics and some of them are of my husband (who is not a dirty, redneck, retarded pig, who doesn’t bathe and has all of his teeth, mmmkay?), so let’s all relish in the photographs that prove this.
There. So we’re all clear on this now right? Hubby is not dirty, has all of his teeth, is not retarded nor is he a hillbilly (’cause I’m certain that’s what you were all thinking. Ya). Hopefully this will squash all of those nasty internet rumors. **Insert rolling eyes here**……muahahahahahhahaa.
