Oh My Gawd Sodagirl!
Why do I torture myself for a freakin burger?

April 19, 2006

I asked my husband to drive me to McDonald’s today. Why oh why do I even bother? Here is my conversation with the idiot cashier.

Cashier: Hi can I help you?

Me: Yes, I’d like combo # 5, no lettuce, rootbeer and a barbeque sauce (I like dipping my fries in it)

Cashier: It’s 10 cents.

Me: The whole order?

Cashier: No, the barbeque sauce.

Me: Ummm why?

Cashier: Because you didn’t order McNuggets.

Me: Okay. So?

Cashier: Well, because the barbeque sauce is for nuggets and you have fries.

Me: Okay, but I’m guessing the barbeque sauce has no knowledge of whether it will have nuggets or fries dipped into it. None at all.

Cashier: Ya. It’s 10 cents though.

Me: Would you give me ketchup for free?

Cashier: Ya.

Me: Okay then, let’s pretend we’re trading. I will trade you the ketchup that you’ll give me for free and you give me a barbeque sauce and then we’re even. I’ll ask for like 5 ketchup but you’ll only have to trade me one barbeque sauce.

Cashier: **Blank stare**

Me: Okay let’s pretend I’ve ordered nuggets.

Cashier: I can’t.

Me: Sure you can. (In my mind I’m pretending you’re not such an uptight dickwad)

Cashier: Will you pay the 10 cents?

Me: I guess I’d better ’cause I wouldn’t want Rotten Ronnie’s to go out of business and have to file for bankruptcy seeing as it would be my fault for not paying that 10 cents for my barbeque sauce. I know they’re on shaky ground as it is and maybe only raking in a few billion a year so Heaven forbid I should feck that up for them.

Cashier: **Blank stare**

Me: I have a question for you.

Cashier: Okay.

Me: If I ordered nuggets and had wanted like 4 barbeque sauce, would you charge me 10 cents each for the extra ones?

Cashier: No.

WHAT THE FUCK????????????????????? Pardon me while I smash my head on the brick wall.

Posted by Sassy @ 4:46 pmUncategorized19 comments  

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19 Responses to “Why do I torture myself for a freakin burger?”

  1. I think stupidity is a job requirement there. I’ve found if you can speak the same language as the clerk it’s a miracle.

    Nice to see another Calgary blog

  2. You should have asked for mayo for the fries!!! That would have really thrown the cashier for a loop!!!!!


  3. WTF??? I worked for McDonalds when I was in high school and never charged people for whatever condiments they asked for. That was just wrong and stupid of them.

  4. Stop eating there. They suck ass.

  5. Nobody ever accused fast-food employees of being the brightest on the planet.

    Reminds me of an experience I had at Burger King:

    Me: I’d like a Bacon Double Cheeseburger.

    BK: We don’t have Bacon Double Cheeseburgers. But I can sell you a Double Cheeseburger and put bacon on it.

    Me: K. Let’s do that, then.

  6. I would have asked for $10 worth of their 10 cent BBQ Sauces. Watch his little pea brain explode. :P

  7. OMG! Stupid people just drive me insaine! What a prick!

  8. U got the big mac didn’t u, .. you lucky bizatch

    and lmfao at the McDonalds chick. Back when I was highschool I was a crew chief there (shhhh don’t tell anyone)- I got the title within 4 feckin months of workin there.. shows what brainiacs I was surrounded with. Yeah, they tried to tell me that too that I should be charging .10 and I was like thats so fuckin stupid even the stupid kids arent doin it!!
    The only time I would do it was to bitches I couldn’t stand and I would actually overcharge them.. like .30 for one. Cause I’m bad to the bone.

  9. After a while, banging your head doesn`t even hurt anymore.

  10. Your headache is my laughter. Thanks for sharing that.

  11. I’m with Karen on this one…they suck ass. On a rare occasion and I mean rare, I get desperate enough and forgetful enough (of previous tortuous visits) to Ronnie’s House of Fast-food Hell. My last visit was about six months ago. I get to the drive thru and think “whoo hoo” as I was the only one there. There wasn’t even anybody inside. So I order my quarter ponder with cheese (the only sandwich there I can stomach), pull to the first window and pay and then pulled to the pickup window. I watch thru the window the vapid soul who is working the front counter and apparently the pick up window also. As I said, I am the only customer there. So I watch this “person” for like ten minutes as they stare off into space. I’m thinking to myself this is taking a long time to cook my friggin’ burger but at least it will be fresh. And then this happened. As I watched, the vacant automaton turned around, grabbed a bag and put a burger from there little heat lamp area and put it in the bag. I had been watching for ten fucking minutes and that burger had been there the whole time. For ten minutes I sat there while this waste of human flesh whisked about the universe in a cerebral paddy wagon. WTF! Then the son of a bitch gave me one of those “are you finished bothering me?” kinda looks.
    The situation was very close to having the police involved.
    Needless to say I do not Patronize the clown anymore.

  12. This was both funny and familiar to most people. Still, I won’t go near fast-food outlets like McDonald’s or Burger King, haven’t for years – as a friend put it to me, it’s all eyelids and testicles. Even if I wasn’t a vegetarian, that’d put me off for life… It’s also somewhat true that all manner of bits go into these things, with hundreds of cows coagulated into just one burger. When you add up how much that increases the risk of BSE.. ack. If folks eat meat, they’re much better off making their own burgers at home. That way, you avoid dealing with the sub-norms who inhabit these places and have the customer relation skills of Pol Pot. x

  13. Some places (don’t know if it’s McD’s or not) actually do charge if you want EXTRA with your nuggets … I think BK does that …
    I’ve seen signs posted that shows how many sauces you get depending on number of chicken bits you get.
    What you need to do is order chicken chunks a couple times and save the extras. I got a 5 piece last night and they put TWO sauces in the bag … TWO … I think for 5 nugget I used 1/2 of one. Stash the other one emergency …
    Or … I wonder if you could return it and get 10 cents back :)

  14. lmao…
    fast food, gotta love it

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  17. Oh wow lol that’s funny!


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