Oh My Gawd Sodagirl!
This is why I don’t cook.

June 14, 2006

Here is a recipe that my BF (again it’s best friend, not boyfriend) Karen showed me today. And I’ve also included how I interpret it. Thus the reason I try to avoid the kitchen at all costs.

Recipe from

1 lb. boneless skinless chicken breasts, cut into strips Chicken boobies cut into stripes

1 medium each: green and red pepper, cut into strips Rainbow veggies again cut into stripes

1 medium onion, cut into thin wedges
Ewwww I’m not giving an onion a wedgie, that’s gross.

1/2 cup KRAFT Original BarBQ Sauce
Squirt most of the bottle into the bowl

8 flour tortillas (6 inch), warmed Oooo 6 inches warmed…..wicked.

1 cup KRAFT Tex Mex Shredded Cheese I don’t have time to fly to Texas for cheese.

1/2 cup salsa I would love to learn to speak Spanish.

1/4 cup sour cream If it’s sour, I don’t want it. I like ice cream. Ooo la la.

PREHEAT grill to medium-high heat. Toss chicken and vegetables with barbecue sauce. Let stand 5 min. to marinate. You have to preheat a grill? Marinate? Is that like urinate? I’m not doing that to my meat.

GRILL chicken and vegetables in stir-fry basket 7 to 10 min. or until chicken is cooked through and vegetables are crisp-tender, stirring occasionally. Huh? You cook it in a basket? What? Sup? Where’s the phone? I’m ordering out.

SPOON mixture evenly onto tortillas; top with cheese, salsa and sour cream. Roll up. Why is spoon written like SPOON? Why are they yelling at me? What does that mean? Is that code for ‘run the stove is going to blow up? What if I want to FORK it? FORK me? FORK you!!!!! And roll up? I prefer to stand upright. So naner naner naner.

See. I’m just going to let my husband continue on doing the grilling. I don’t even know how to turn the barbeque on. Or light it. Or whatever it is that one does to preheat a grill.

Posted by Sassy @ 4:20 pmUncategorized4 comments  

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4 Responses to “This is why I don’t cook.”

  1. Despite your comments – I suddenly find myself starving…

  2. You scare me lol….step away from the kitchen!

  3. I will show you what a Grill basket looks like next time you come over for dinner… ROFL!!

  4. Ha! If I send you a cookbook, will you put notes beside the directions?

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