Oh My Gawd Sodagirl!
Weekend update.  Stay with me now.

June 19, 2006

Good Monday morning. Well take out the ‘good’. It’s morning and it’s Monday but it sure as shit is brown ain’t good.

I have the migraine from hell. I swear there are tiny gremlins in my brain, hitting me with jack hammers. I want the little fuckers to die already. I spent most of my day on the couch yesterday, lying around like some half dead slug. But I just couldn’t move. I woke up this morning around 5:30, from, I might add, a very fitfull sleep, but my headache wasn’t quite as bad. It actually felt like it was almost gone. So I did a very brief happy dance and thought, wow, this is going to be a good way to start the week. Wrong. So very wrong.

I walked my daughter to school and as I’m walking home, I could feel the damn gremlins starting up again in my head, making me feel sick. So here I sit, in front of the computer screen, which by the way, I’m sure is totally good for my migraine. But alas, I can’t help myself. Can you say addiction?

Okay, so let’s back track a bit shall we? Ready? Good.

Saturday, I spent the day cleaning for a couple of my wenches friends, Crazy Newfie chickiepoo and Sex Goddess (sheesh, little stuck on yourself or what? Muahahhaha), as they were bringing their families for a barbeque on Saturday evening. I cleaned things I didn’t even know I owned, mowed the lawn, helped my son put our new patio set together (which FYI would have taken ONE normal, capable person about 20 mins but took us TWO not so capable people about 2 hours), slung orders like Squidward does at the Crabby Patty for my bread bitch to get his ass in gear and make some homemade brown bread so I could impress my friends with the cooking that I did not do. Come on, get a move on.

The barbeque was a hit and I’m sure mostly because I cooked nothing. Nada. Zip. Zilch. Zero. I was the serving wench apparently. That I didn’t mess up. Yay me. My friends brought their yummy salads and my husband did all the cooking. I’m sure there would have been lawsuits had I done the grilling.

My Friday was exciting. And by exciting I mean I wanted to rip off my own hangnails because I was so bored. That’s just how exciting it was. I was at the end of my rope with being a SAHmother. Don’t get me wrong, I love my children more than anything but I’m human and sometimes I need a stiff drink break from them. Luckily for me, my son Matt said he’d stay home with the little ones, while hubby and I and the other 2 teens went out do some shopping. We only went to Walmart but lemme tell ya, just to walk around without having to drag someone to the bathroom (my husband is totally capable of going himself), not to hear any ‘can I have this? please? just one?’, over and over again, to be able to actually look at the different brands of feminine hygiene products (Who knew there were wings of all sorts of lengths and styles?) without having to grab the first thing my hand can reach while being pulled in 4 different directions, not to hear ‘clean up in aisle 9′ because one of my monsters children has knocked over something glass and liquid. Heaven I tell ya, Heaven.

So back to today. Now if I could just get the maid to finish cleaning, then………..wait, I am the maid. Fuck. That blows monkey ass. This is totally off topic, but I just got a wiff of myself and I must say, I smell fiiiiiiiiiiinnnneeeeeeee. I love my new perfume. I got it from my son for Mother’s day and it’s devine. Anyhoooo, back to the maid, which is me. I want to clean out my storage room but I’m skeered. It’s packed like sardines in there with boxes that I’m sure noone has opened in like 3 years, so why oh why are we keeping them? That is the question. And that is why I must brave the dreaded storage room. I’m not 100% sure I will tackle that today since all I feel like doing is lying in my bed, with drool running out the side of my mouth while I slumber in dreamland. We’ll see how that goes.

Okay, well, I’m not going to enjoy my Monday but I hope the rest of you out in blogland do. Is it Friday yet?

Posted by Sassy @ 12:14 pmUncategorized3 comments  

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3 Responses to “Weekend update. Stay with me now.”

  1. I’m sure you smell great, and that you drool in your sleep, but most of all, I hope your head feels mucho better-o soon-o.

  2. I’m still jealous that you have a bread bitch.

    And I so hear ya about the kiddos. Don’t tell anyone else because I really do love my kids, I do. But I am so glad to be going back to work outside the home again. I’m not cracked up to be a SAHM. I find myself knockin back redwine like its liquid sex.

    Anywho, boo headache, boo Monday.. yay wine.

    ;)

  3. My brain used to hurt alot. Got rid of the malfunctioning bugger. With a battery drill and a nice long icepick you too can perform a home labotomy. I am much the better for it.





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