Oh My Gawd Sodagirl!
Swimming anyone?

July 14, 2006

See the above pictures? Ah ya. Wipes. And see the second picture, that I’ve nicely highlighted? In the red there? DO NOT FLUSH.

I was happily being super lazy busy, when my 10 year old comes running and screaming, “Mom, there’s water, like everywhere”!!!!!!!!!!!

In a state of near panic I ask where? He tells me that our bathroom is kinda filled with water. Hmmm, kinda filled with water. I’m skeered now.

“What do you mean, kinda filled with water?”

“Well mom, the toilet has waaaay more water in it that it’s supposed to.”

“Oh that ‘kinda filled with water’ scenerio.”

We take off running and to my horror, my bathroom is now a swimming pool. And I’m pretty sure the mock swimming pool had teeny, tiny bits of chocolate floating in it. Okay, so I’m delusional and I know in my heart of hearts it’s not chocolate but please, for Godsake, let me live in my fantasy world and believe it’s chocolate.

I start screaming for someone to help me but there’s noone here. I’m the helper. Ryan is quite frantic now and frankly so am I because the water is still rising and overflowing. I have ceramic tile in the bathroom so I know the chocolate water is not going to damage my floors but now it’s creeping towards the door and will hit the nice hardwood floor, which I’m pretty certain will not look so nice after chocolate water has graced it’s presence.

I start throwing towels down on the floor and begin the lovely chore of mopping up the mess. As I’m doing this, I’m grilling my son about how this happened.

“I don’t know. I came in here to pee and it was already like this.”

“You’re sure? You’re telling me the truth?”

“Yes, really I am. But I’ll find out the truth for you mom, be right back.”

So my little detective comes back in a minute or two, as I’m still on my hands and knees mopping this shit up, literally.

“Mom, I found out what happened.”

“Oh ya? Spill it then.” No pun intended.

“Maddy put some wipes in the toilet.”

“Oh. Lord. How many?”

“She said all of them.”

“All of them? There’s 80 wipes in a container and there was at least half left!”

So my darling pumpkinpie put about 40 wipes in the toilet and then flushed. Dear God.

“Miss, you’d better come here right now and explain yourself.”

She comes out of the bedroom and stands outside the door, with her finger in her mouth and a pouty look on her face.

“Okay, I’m listening.”

“Well, I’m sorry.”

“Well that’s good that you’re sorry, but I really want to know why you’d put that many wipes in the toilet? Especially since they’re not flushable at all. Not even one is supposed to go in the toilet. Not even one.”

“Well mom, I really really wanted a clean butt, so I used them all.”

“Listen, if your butt is that dirty that you feel the need to use 40 wipes on it, how about next time, we just put you in the tub? Mmmkay?”

“Okay mom, that sounds good.”

And she walks off to play Barbies. *Shaking my head and hoping I’ve got vodka some lemonade.

PS…I would have taken pictures of the flowing toilet water but I had to decide, do I want some fun flood pictures or do I want to clean the mess before it ruins my hardwood? The hardwood won out.

Posted by Sassy @ 12:40 pmUncategorized11 comments  

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11 Responses to “Swimming anyone?”

  1. ROFL @ chocolate pieces. Honey I can feel your pain because my daughter did that to me once…. at a hotel of all places. So imagine me at the front desk asking for a plunger. lol

  2. ROFL @ chocolate pieces. Honey I can feel your pain because my daughter did that to me once…. at a hotel of all places. So imagine me at the front desk asking for a plunger. lol

  3. LOL oh my bringing back memories of the boys putting things down our toilet at the first house! Now granted we didn’t have chocolate pieces;)

  4. LMAO! So she thought everything ok? I will love to get your daughter with mine and see what kind of trouble they can get into!

  5. That reminds me when we were potty training..I told Taylor to never put the wipes in the potty. I think I scared her insanely, cause she never did. Yikes, 40 wipes..wow… Maybe Maddy was cleaning the entire bathroom, instead of her bum..

    Thats it mommy, she was cleaning for you..since you were playing on the computer..poor sweet Maddy doing the chores…LOL..ok..I have officially used “LOL”..help me..

  6. ooooo ~shitty

  7. Too funny! Well not really, but ya gotta laugh!!!


  8. pmsl, but only because it didn’t happen to me!

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