May 30, 2007

I made an appointment today with my doctor, who is apparently not my doctor. Confused? Ya, join the club.

We moved here almost 4 years ago and I put my name on a waiting list to be accepted at the clinic near my home for a family doctor. I was called late in 2003 and told, indeed I would be accepted as a patient with Dr. X. He’s name really isn’t Dr. X but that sounds very mysterious, doesn’t it? I thought so. I’ve been to Dr. X a few times, not many as I’ve been relatively healthy. I do have to occasionally go get my prescription refilled (for my intense beauty, gotta combat the effects with pro-ugly pills just so I’m not sooo hot) (remember, S.A.R.C.A.S.M) and there have been times that my doctor, who apparently ISN’T my doctor has been away so I therefore, had to see another doctor, who also isn’t my doctor, to refill my pro-ugly pills. Let’s flash forward now, a few years, to today. I was told that I wasn’t in the system and that Dr. X isn’t really my doctor because I didn’t have a meet and greet kinda visit the first time. Umm okay. I did but that’s okay if you don’t remember me. I wasn’t on my pro-ugly pills back then and I probably blinded him with my gorgeous self and thus, he has blocked me out as the ‘woman who took my eye sight with her fantastic self’. I can hardly blame the man. But still, I should be in the system of being the patient of my doctor who isn’t my doctor.

I hope I’ve sufficiently confused you because it would be totally not fair to me if I were the only one in a dense state over this whole ‘he’s not your doctor but really is your doctor but we have no record of him being your doctor’ scenerio. Let’s keep the score card fair people, fair.

I go on Monday, so let’s hope I remember to take my pro-ugly pills so I don’t give the doctor who’s not really my doctor a heart attack. Making him blind was bad enough. Oh the guilt.

May 29, 2007

Back in 1995, I was very sick for 3 months. I was sure I was dying (paranoid much?), had some kind of brain disorder, or thought perhaps gremlins were taking over my gray matter. I went for blood work, had tests done and finally was given a ct scan. It was finally discovered that I was suffering from a rebound headache, started by my migraine suffering. And guess what? I’m pretty sure it’s back.

It’s been a good, solid 2 months since it’s been going on again and I’ve got every single symptom:

Nausea
Anxiety
Memory problems
Depression
Trouble sleeping
Restlessness
Irritialbility
Difficulty concentrating

I thought this was a good picture that reflected my pain because the light hitting my eye looks like a lightning bolt piercing my skull and that’s what it feels like. Or maybe it just looks like I’m being spotlighted by law inforcement for being so beautiful. I never thought my looks would be such a burden. *Sigh*. I can’t help it people, I can’t help it. (If you’re a new reader here, keep in mind, I use sarcasm, A.L.O.T.)

I’m thinking maybe I should see my doctor even though I’m a doctor of loooooove because I’m sure he might be better able to cure me than me. He has a degree in healing and I have degree in sarcasm which I’m pretty sure won’t get me out of this. At least so far it’s not helped. I guess I’ll have to put my crime fighting on hold for now. Criminals all over the world, will be breathing a sigh of relief for now. But watch out betches, I’m coming to get you soon.