Oh My Gawd Sodagirl!
I’m not Perez Hilton.

November 28, 2007

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A couple of Sassy haters commenters at my new job site, told me today that I should stop trying to be Perez Hilton. I wasn’t aware that I was trying to be an overweight, blue haired man, but gosh, thanks for putting me in check. Plus he’s got a penis (I’m assuming) and I don’t (fact). As well, we all know that Perez is such a great writer and oh so funny. That’s sarcasm incase you missed it, by the way (they didn’t get it, so I’m helping them out). I, apparently, am not allowed to use sarcasm, because, I guess Hilton invented it? Ya okay. I’m older than PH, so if anyone invented sarcasm, it was me.

I get such a kick out of people who get all bent outta shape about celeb sites. They get all defensive and act like they actually know the celebrity and take it personally. I get paid to write about celebs and if I feel like making fun of them, well guess what? I’m gonna do it. To date, I’ve been called a retard, incompetent, a woman who MUST be married to a black man (still trying to figure out what that’s supposed to mean), been told I should marry Paul McCartney if I love him so much (um, nope I don’t), been SCREAMED AT (you know, hollered at with caps on) for being a “Britney hater,” told to stop being so mean to Celine Dion’s son because he has long hair-that’s all I said, was that he has long hair and my own son has long hair and gets called a girl all the time, so bite me.

I’ve been told I suck, I’m a loser and now, I need to stop trying to be Perez. My heart aches, oh yes, for real. And by my heart aches, I say bring it. I could care less, what you think of me because quite honestly, you don’t know me. I will say that I’ve received MANY nice comments, telling me how witty I am and those people are obviously the smart ones. Very smart. Call me, we’ll do lunch. So to the people who like to trash me and my stories. Yawn.

In other, exciting news, is it the new year yet? I feel like I’ve been in the Christmas time warp because we’ve done everything so early this year. Our tree is up, shopping done and wrapped and under the tree, and since I don’t do any holiday baking, that’s just one more thing I don’t have to do. And yet, it’s not even quite December and I’m wondering if Christmas is over. I may start a holiday countdown or something. Wait. Nah, that’s too much work. I got things I have to get done, like not being Perez Hilton.

Posted by Sassy @ 9:26 pmUncategorized6 comments  

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6 Responses to “I’m not Perez Hilton.”

  1. I learned a long time ago (and I’m really old so I know) to just ignore what people say about me. Well, unless it’s about BO or bad breath. So just do what you always do and f-em!

    You really get paid to do celeb stuff? I love that shit!

  2. Okay, I think it’s a good thing you’re not Perez Hilton. I woulda said thanks! [big smile]. I never get why people kiss his ass! Why would celebs give a shit about what he has to say???

  3. Hmm.

    I’m such a dork. I have no idea who Perez Hilton is!!

    Seriously! At first I thought you were making a joke about Paris Hilton. (Then I realized you weren’t. *blushing*)

    Anyway, whoever he is I’m glad you aren’t him and I’m glad you’re you. Because if you were him and not you and I liked you but you were him then I wouldn’t really like anyone.

    I have to go. I confuse myself ;-)

  4. so people actualy get upity about celibrity writers writing about celebrity writers like they write about clebrities? I certainly hope these people aren’t breeding.

  5. You’re famous once you get haters! You go, girl!

  6. oh, listen, sassy, i’ve been meaning to deliver the earth shattering blow that you are not Perez Hilton. Really. I want you to try and remain calm. It’s going to be okay that you’re not a gay man with odd colored hair. k? hang in there. i’m here for you.
    smoochies, livi





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