Oh My Gawd Sodagirl!
Santa is fat.  And Happy New Year.

January 3, 2008

Well the holidays are officially over. Kinda. My kids are still home until the 7th but the presents are put away and the tree is down and the snowmen in their boxes. I did all of that on December 26th. After having my tree up since November 17th, it was time.

I’m sure all of the parents out there that do the whole Santa routine, put out a plate of cookies and a glass of milk and may or may not put something out for the reindeer. This year, we had to do something slightly different after a pre-Christmas conversation I had with my seven year old daughter.

Mom, this year we are not putting out cookies for Santa.

Um, why not?

Well, because have you seen him? He’s fat. He doesn’t look healthy. I’m sorry Mom, but Santa Claus just does not need one more cookie. I will not contribute to his unhealthyness. Is that a word Mom?

Ah, well I’m still stuck on the fact that you used ‘contribute.’

I’m seven. I know that stuff.

Of course you do.

So? Can we leave Santa something else instead of the cookies?

Sure, what do you want to leave him?

He can have some fruit and those reindeer can have a carrot. They probably pig out too and there’s no need for that.

You’re probably right.

Yes I am.

I think you are.

Good, it’s settled then. Santa can have fruit. And water. He doesn’t need to fill up on milk either. Water is good for your body.

Yes. How did you get so smart?

Duh, I was born this way.

There you go, that’s my heartwarming Christmas story. Santa is fat. Happy 2008.


Oh, and by the way, thank you to anyone, whether you’re a friend or a stranger, who clicked my posts and helped me get to the bonus level for work. It’s a great way to start out the new year!

Posted by Sassy @ 12:49 amHoliday Shiznat4 comments  

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4 Responses to “Santa is fat. And Happy New Year.”

  1. I think that your children will grow up to run a gym or a healthfood store after this story. That was so funny.
    Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

  2. Heh. Great story.

  3. I Love this!!!!! Thanks for the Giggle Maddy!!!!
    Mom…..you goat a smart one there for sure!!!!

  4. got not goat …..shesh….fat fingers

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