Oh My Gawd Sodagirl!
I kid you not.

September 7, 2008

I’m jinxed. I swear, the employees of the grocery store that I shop at are trained to annoy the shit out of me. They probably get bonuses for doing so. I’m serious.

I took my youngest and headed to the grocery store today – not a great idea, especially at 4 pm on a Saturday afternoon because it’s like a mad house in there at that time. You’d think people were going to be hunkering down for weeks and stocking up on supplies for the winter. It’s okay everyone, the grocery store is open until 11 pm and it’s open ALL DAY SUNDAY TOO. I’m going to go back to shopping at 9 am on Tuesday’s…it’s dead at that time. Maybe the smart employees are working then too.

I quickly got everything I needed and luckily got into a fairly short line, which was great. Cashier was friendly, speedy and SMART. Got through no problem. Happy! Then my son brings over a jacket – a jacket that he just had to have today. I had bought him a winter jacket just last year and it’s still in perfect shape and still fits him. But no, he spied this stylish brown one and was not going to leave until we got it. I did agree with him, it’s very nice but dude, I just got through the checkout, no hassles, pretty quick service and I just want to go home. He says that the ’8 items or less’ lane is open and only 2 people in the line. Okay, fine, we’ll do it. I have all of my groceries in the cart, in bags, all paid for. Obviously.

I’m standing in the line with the jacket in one hand, wallet in the other and I see the chick at the checkout to my right. She’s eyeballing me. Eyeballing my cart. Eyeballing waaaay too much. I can feel that familiar tingle (and it’s not the good one) going up my spine. No, I can’t get through a grocery store shopping experience without someone giving me a hard time. That’s against the law. Against THE LAW.

She finally comes over.

Hi

Hi

What are you doing?

I’m in the line. To pay for the jacket.

Just the jacket?

Yes.

She is back to eyeballing my groceries. That are IN BAGS.

You’re not paying for the items in your cart?

I did.

When?

When I went through the other checkout.

Do you have a receipt?

Of course I do.

Oh. Can I see it?

As I’m fumbling with the jacket and wallet, trying to rifle through the bags to see if I put the receipt in one, I see her looking at me, annoyed, that I can’t find the receipt.

Can I just pay for the jacket and then I’ll look for the receipt?

I suppose.

Gee, thanks.

I pay for the jacket and then find the other receipt, which was in the front pocket of my jeans. I show it to her and she scans it like she’s going to find the cure for STUPIDITY on it. I know I rolled my eyes at least FORTY TIMES. She hands it back to me and says, that she just had to be sure I had paid for my groceries. I gave her a death glare. I then looked to my right and my kids had taken several balls out of a display basket and the balls were rolling all over the floor, near the checkout that ‘Miss I have to check your receipt and make sure you’re not a criminal’ worked at and normally I would tell my kids that they have to pick up those balls and put them back where they got them, but instead I said nothing because Miss Receipt Police was giving them and me, dirty looks, I’m sure waiting for me to make my kids put the balls back. I kept my mouth shut, grinning, knowing SHE’D have to pick them up.

My daughter runs over and says that she will pick them all up and I said that that was not necessary – I glanced over at sourpuss and smiled and said to my child, ‘that nice lady is going to pick them up, don’t worry about it.’ It was then her turn to give me a death look but wait, I DON’T CARE.

Ha. I love happy endings.

Posted by Sassy @ 1:34 amI want to Punch You in the Neck3 comments  

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3 Responses to “I kid you not.”

  1. My Gawd woman. You could write an entire blog dedicated to your grocery store experiences. How does all this happen to one person??

    I would have left all the balls on the ground too. LMAO!

  2. You didn’t hurt yourself with the eye rolling, right? No sprains or strains?

    Okay, good. Just needed to check. ;-)

  3. I did actually, I’m sporting an eye cast…haha.





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