December 22, 2009
I love Chenille yarn. It’s so soft and warm. I have a couple of sweaters made with it and I love them. And what’s nicer than cuddling up on the couch, covered with a Chenille blanket? OK, maybe eating chocolate and drinking from a giant bottle of vodka while cuddling with said Chenille yarn blanket, but you get my drift.
So, I have this red blanket made with Chenille yarn. It’s such a pretty red, so rich, so vibrant and the blanket is so warm. Obviously, sometimes, a blanket needs to be washed. And red Chenille yarn blanket is no exception. The first three times it was washed, nothing happened. I put it in the washer on the gentle cycle and dried it in the dryer on a low setting. That’s what the care instructions said to do. And I’m all about following the care instructions. DON’T DEVIATE FROM THE CARE INSTRUCTIONS. I followed the rules dammit. To a ‘T’. And yet? Something evil happened on washing number four.
Who knew I’d be sobbing because red Chenille yarn blanket hurt me? Destroyed me. Seriously. I have no forgiveness for it. Or should I blame the washer? The dryer? My neighbor?
I put blanket in the washer so it would be all clean and smell nice. I followed those care instructions like a good laundry girl and when it was done, lovingly took it from the washer and put it in the dryer. Set it to dry on low AS PER THE CARE INSTRUCTIONS. Uh huh.
And?
This is what came out:
My blanket is no longer a blanket. It’s a pile of fuzzy red, uh, fuzz. What the hell is that? How does a blanket, which was completely intact when it was put in the washer and then the dryer, come out looking like it went through a meat grinder? ‘Splain this to me. I no longer have a red Chenille yarn blanket. Well, technically I do, but I’m guessing it won’t do a very good job of keeping me warm. At all.
I’m now covering up with an old Blue’s Clues blanket that belonged to my son when he was little.
Blanket fail.
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December 22nd, 2009 at 10:58 am, bubblewnch
Says:
Bad Blanket! Bad Blanket! Shank that bitch! Get a new one.
bubblewnch´s last blog ..It’s all your fault
Sassy
Reply:
December 22nd, 2009 at 8:42 pm
I shanked. Gonna replace that bitch. Ha.
Sassy´s last blog ..In which I stabbed the red blanket.
December 22nd, 2009 at 12:33 pm, Nikki
Says:
Nikki´s last blog ..It’s been a while
Sassy
Reply:
December 22nd, 2009 at 8:43 pm
I will. I will replace that rotten bitch blanket. lol
Luff you, too.
Sassy´s last blog ..In which I stabbed the red blanket.
December 22nd, 2009 at 8:51 pm, bluepaintred
Says:
move your arbor mist ad so I can read all the words in the post *pout*
bluepaintred´s last blog ..LoLz
Sassy
Reply:
December 22nd, 2009 at 9:06 pm
I, um, have no idea how to fix anything on here… Karen does all my fixin’. lol. I will have to ask her about it… me not equipped to do that fancy shit. lol
Sassy´s last blog ..In which I stabbed the red blanket.
December 22nd, 2009 at 8:56 pm, bluepaintred
Says:
thank you!
I had a sweater made of that stuff. it got the tiniest hole in it, seriously tiny, but the next washing, it dies, just like this, only smaller.
the good news is the blankie fuzz is still jsut as soft as the blankie was, so you can make yourself a super comfie merkin now
)
bluepaintred´s last blog ..LoLz
Sassy
Reply:
December 22nd, 2009 at 9:07 pm
Yeah, ’cause I’m like totally crafty to make ANYTHING out of that fuzz.
Sassy´s last blog ..In which I stabbed the red blanket.
bluepaintred
Reply:
December 22nd, 2009 at 9:20 pm
AND THEN! You can sell them on etsy and be features in craftastrophe!
bluepaintred´s last blog ..LoLz
Sassy
Reply:
December 22nd, 2009 at 9:24 pm
Yeah, I will get rich! Wait, no, probably not rich. Made fun of. Ha.
Sassy´s last blog ..In which I stabbed the red blanket.
December 22nd, 2009 at 9:25 pm, bluepaintred
Says:
rich…made fun of…totally the same thing
bluepaintred´s last blog ..LoLz